October 5, 2014
A man walked into a bar. He didn’t greet the bartender, didn’t acknowledge any of the other customers. He sat down and ordered a drink. When he received it a few minutes later, he downed the entire cup straight away, and ordered another. He downed the second drink and ordered another. Only after destroying his liver downing dozens of drinks did he stumble out the door, slamming his head on the door handles in the process. The other drunkards laughed at him. The bartender wiped the empty glasses and shook his head.
October 6, 2014
The same man walked into the same bar. Today, he only managed about six drinks before he stood up on his stool chair and cupped his hands to his mouth, announcing that he would come drink every day until the day he died. And that would be soon. The men in the bar laughed, and asked him to buy drinks for the house if he truly was about to die. The women in the bar cooed in sarcastic sympathy. Only the bartender stayed silent during the speech. He handed the man a glass of water and told him to leave while he could still walk on his own.
October 7, 2014
Same man, same bar. As soon as he walked in, today, he did not order a drink. Rather, he introduced himself as Benjamin Scott and took the time to shake the hands of every person in the room. People looked at him quizzically. He didn’t seem to care as he announced this time that he was starting a business before he died. It may be a stupid idea, he said, but it would give him some entertainment until the terminal illness kills him off. He proceeded to claim that the unlabeled bottle of water he was holding in his hand was in fact a nutritious, transparent blend of all necessary vitamins, minerals, and macromolecules that a human needed to survive, as long as one drank a single bottle a day. He exited the doors, and returned with an entire box of bottled water, slamming it onto the tiled floor of the bar. He then stood on the same stool that he stood drunk once before and began taking “customers” of his own. The bartender chucked lightly and ignored the sale. Out of pity, three men and one woman came up and handed him five-dollar bills as Benjamin Scott grinned and handed them a bottle each. He then made a show of drinking a bottle himself in one go, wiped his chin, and shouted that people would regret it by not buying it today. Two more men and one woman gave in and bought bottles, muttering to themselves that he had gone insane and this was their donation to a man about to die.
October 8, 2014
Benjamin Scott walked into the bar. This time, he did not take the time to shake each and every customer’s hands. Instead, he set up a booth on the seat that he usually sat in front of the bartender, and announced that he would be selling his miraculous blend for just one more day. The five men and two women who bought the bottles yesterday walked up and immediately bought a bar. To this, Mr. Scott held up two fingers, asking for twice the amount that they had paid yesterday. One woman scratched her head and returned to her table. The other six customers did not hesitate to take out ten dollars out of their pockets and return with Scott’s unlabeled bottle of water. Out of curiosity, two more men and two more women came up to Scott and ordered a bottle themselves, and he sold them for five dollars each. Having sold ten bottles, satisfied, Mr. Scott exited the bar.
October 10, 2014
Benjamin Scott returned after having skipped a day, and this time, he ordered a drink from the bartender, his usual cup of whiskey, and sat down, taking unusually small sips. Eleven customers immediately surrounded his seat, demanding that he sold them the magical blend that he had sold just three and two days before. He smiled and stated that he was out of stock, and the seven men and four women sadly returned to their tables. The bartender, curious, glanced at the sight, but ignored the crowd and continued serving drinks and wiping down glasses. After ordering two more drinks, Scott walked out of the door quietly.
October 12, 2014
Mr. Scott entered the bar with a confident amble. He greeted the bartender, who greeted him back, and then immediately announced that he was back with another product: anti-caffeine mints. He assured the crowd that unlike the name, the mints did not combat caffeine; rather, instead of fighting off sleep, the mints provided the fulfillment of sleep without requiring the hours of sleep itself. In other words, edible sleep; one mint equaled one hour of sleep. The eleven customers who had rushed to buy the bottles of water scrambled out of their seats to buy the packs of mint for ten dollars each. Six more customers, two men and four women, cautiously also came up to Benjamin Scott, asking if they could also purchase the anti-caffeine mints. Scott smiled and sold them for seven dollars each to the new purchasers.
October 16, 2014
When Benjamin Scott returned to the bar today, he was met with a very crowded shop, with every seat and table full, and several people standing. Every one of them asked about the mints and the miracle blend. However, Scott did not carry either products with him today. Disappointed, the crowd quickly dissipated. Mr. Scott ordered four cups of whisky and swallowed each gulp with great focus staring into the open air. The bartender checked on him to see if he was alright.
October 17, 2014
Salesman Benjamin Scott walked into the bar today, dragging along with him a cart full of heavy boxes. Like yesterday, a mob surrounded Scott, holding up dollar bills and asking for his amazing products. Wagging his finger, Scott stepped back and began opening up the boxes at the corner walls of the bar. The bartender watched for a few minutes, then returned to his business. Mr. Scott, standing on a stool, announced that not only did he bring his nutritious blends and sleep mints, he also brought a new product: saltine crackers that could cure any illness. While many raised their eyebrows at this seemingly impossible food, others simply shrugged their shoulders and mumbled about the effect of the bottles and mint. Every customer in the bar bought some combination of water, mint, and twenty-dollar crackers—all except for the bartender. The bartender patted Scott on the back and congratulated him on the sales while Scott gathered up the empty boxes. Mr. Scott thanked him and bought a bottle of whiskey to take home.
October 30, 2014
Benjamin Scott showed up for the first time in weeks today to the bar. He looked tired, but he brought a single bottle of water, his miracle blend, and told the eager customers in the bar that the bottle was all he had for that day. An auction house opened in the middle of the bar, with the bartender open to whatever happened. The bottle was bought by a man in his forties, complete with a hefty beer belly, for nine-hundred and fifty two dollars.
October 31, 2014
The bar was fully decorated and in a party setting due to Halloween. With everyone celebrating, bar packed full, the bartender himself was dressed in a cowboy outfit, complete with a rope lasso and leather boots. At 11:04 PM, a group of police officers walked into the bar and proceeded to arrest every customer in the room. One officer walked up to the bartender and handed him a sheet of paper, a certificate. The bartender looked it over, chuckled, and shook the officer’s hands. All customers was escorted out of the bar, and the bartender stayed alone in the shop for the rest of today.