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How to Crash and Burn

April 11, 2025

  1. Take all the classes you want. Not just guts that you’ll get easy A’s in, but something that stimulates your intellectual curiosity—professors that will challenge you with heinous assignments so you bring your 120%, exams that will force you to your maximal potential and exceptional focus by having to pull week-long all-nighters. Make sure to craft a list that your peers will (probably?) awe at. Overload. Petition for more.
  2. Hold leadership positions. That feeling of power and respect that you get from being president of the Pokémon Go Club! Treasurer of the most coveted consulting group on campus, too, maybe, if you got in. The more clubs, the better. All the extracurriculars.
  3. Achieve peak social networking. Each and every friend or acquaintance is a connection for the future. Go out every other night. Schedule meetups, hangouts, d-hall meals, board game nights, parties, study sessions, coffee chats, group projects, movie nights, karaoke, late-night walks, picnics, thrift trips, Sunday brunches.
  4. Keep going. Attend three back-to-back office hours, rewrite essays that already got A’s, highlight every reading in five colors, organize study guides for people who didn’t ask, cold-email professors at midnight, show up to lectures sick, book all your meeting rooms a week in advance, meal prep quinoa bowls you’ll never eat, draft your LinkedIn post before you’ve done the thing, Google Doc everything, Notion everything, G-Cal everything, track your sleep and skip it anyway, cry in the stacks and keep typing, schedule boba with people you don’t like, apply to twenty internships in one night, triple-book your evenings, refresh Canvas every five minutes, read ahead five chapters, run the club, start another one, plan mixers for both, go to four formals in one weekend, miss none of them, say yes to everything, say yes to everything, say yes to everything.

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Prompt from Daily Themes Week 11: Catalogue
Create a catalogue of rules or reasons or procedures for doing something. Under this pretext of the practical, insinuate a judgment of the thing being done.